Stoner Sex: Personal Pot Preferences, Experimentation, Gloria Leonard & Boning in Bed

Dear Hyapatia,
I am having a problem with my dude that may not seem very big to most people, but hear me out. He likes to smoke joints. I like to smoke a bong or a pipe. I think he wastes too much pot in a joint, and we go through our stash faster that way. He says I am nuts and that we go through it just as fast either way. When we vape, it goes really quick, we both agree on that one. It doesn’t seem like a big deal, but with the price of flowers now, it is a big deal to me. — Veronica

Dear Veronica,
I have to say I agree with you on smoking joints. Joints are great with three or more people, but with just two, it seems to me that since we hold in our toke, the joint continues to burn while no one is hitting on it. Groups of even more people are perfect for joints. I often smoke alone, and I use a dab pen or a pipe when away from home and a bong or vaporizer when I am at home. I think a lot of it is just a personal preference.

Hyapatia,
I hope you can help me. My lady and I have been together for a while now, and things are starting to get boring in bed. I suggested we try some different things, and she thought I meant I wanted to fuck her up the ass. That isn’t exactly what I was suggesting, although I would be into that. I was just hoping to make things more exciting in bed, you know, not the same old thing all the time. Now every time I bring it up, she thinks I’m talking about anal sex. How can I get things more exciting without her thinking that is all I am talking about? What other things can we do? I mean, we have done all the different positions and stuff. — J.

Dear J.,
There are some really cool shops that have sexy clothes that are for the bedroom only. There is stuff for you and her. These shops also have toys and bondage restraints. Don’t go there first, let her lead the search. This way, you will see what she is really into. You can also try role playing—pretending like you just met, or that you are her gigolo or something like that can be exciting for some people. Some couples like doing things in public but keep it so that no one knows. The excitement of being in a new place, possibly getting caught, and the limits on what you can actually do all add to the fun. Just make sure you are not going to offend anyone and that no children could possibly see you. It can be nice to start in public and move to the bedroom. You can each also take turns being dominant. 

Hey Hyapatia,
I heard that Gloria Leonard died the other day. Maybe I am dating myself, but I always liked her. She was a class act, like you. She ran High Society magazine for years. What did she die of, do you know? What was she doing the last several years? — Bobby

Dear Bobby,
Gloria was a very good friend of mine. I remember shooting for High Society in New York. She was on the set the whole time and helped me tremendously. I was new to the business then. After the shoot, we went out to eat. Walking down the streets of New York City, she pulled out a joint and lit it, took a toke and handed it to me. I was amazed. I said, “I didn’t know you could get away with this in New York.”  She said “Well… I can.” We passed a cop, and he just tipped his hat to her and said “Miss Leonard.” Now that is respect! She told me who to work for and who to avoid. She taught me how to say “no” and “not for that kind of money.” She was the epitome of class, and I always tried to emulate that. Her last several years were spent on the big island of Hawaii on the side of a tall hill overlooking the ocean. She loved it there, but also missed the excitement of New York City and all of her friends on the mainland. She died of natural causes, and I can’t say enough good things about her talent and personality. She will be missed.

Hyapatia,
My girl and I watch movies a lot, and we want to know why no one ever seems to have sex in a bed anymore. It is all on couches, in cars, on kitchen tables, outside in the open and all kinds of things no one really does. What is up with that? — Jerry

Dear Jerry,
The movie business tries to make each sex scene seem new and exciting. They are showing you things that you may never actually do in your real life. It can get kind of boring when every scene takes place in bed, so they try to mix it up a bit by changing the scenery. It is just for your entertainment, something to break up the boredom and monotony of life. Videos are an escape from reality, so no, you won’t find much stuff in there that real people do. The cheaper videos have the most unrealistic sex scenes and locations. There are still couples movies out there, but not as many as there used to be. These movies are more true to life.

Ask Hyapatia all of your questions regarding stoner sexuality. Email her at hya@hightimes.com
Last Week’s Stoner Sex: Real Buzz Kills, Communication Troubles, Sex Films & the Golden Age of Porn